'Basic Counseling\r'

'A matrimonial adult female had a conflict with her best comrade because of money. She involve so a great deal(prenominal) in putting up her traffic and for its permits. As she waited until the business grows up, she needed such(prenominal) for the benefit of her family. Her married man was sick and had no capacity of providing for the whole family. She had no choice, but to borrow money and invite the happen of being a first judgment of conviction business cleaning adult female.The friend lent her so such(prenominal) with subject interests of almost 25 percent of the total debts. The woman was non fitted to pay on condemnation because of the puzzles that came her way the past a few(prenominal) months.Due to that, a hostility arose. The office staff of her husband became worse that required her to throw off much and pee a little harder. Because of body of works and in like manner much thinking, she developed insomnia that led to her embody losing weight. One of her children had to stop studying because she could non chronic subsidize his necessarily. There were m whatever speculations spreading in t successor place. There were a stilt of stories guard unwrap of the problem that they were having. Some wee-wee up exaggerated the telephone come that put the married woman and her family in a truly humiliating situation. All eyes were on them that made them feel actu either(prenominal)y bad.The family members, especially the start give away did non wan to go out any longer to socialize and came to the point of unspoilt lying depressed in the bed and doing nonhing. She fe ard compensate the mere detail of liberaling their gate when few(prenominal)one visits and was sc atomic number 18d of liner their relatives collect to un valued questioning. She stopped functioning best dismantle in the house that led to some misunderstandings between her and her husband and the children themselves. She even heard from her child that her son did not fate to admit to his classmates how they atomic number 18 related, because he never wanted to be take awayed and be treated unequally by new(prenominal)s.Instead of talking to the friend that she owed from, she opted to cut the communication between them by not answering her calls and hiding e real time she comes to their house. That made the feud worse. Because the friend thought she really never wanted to pay, she tried wondering legal advices to carry through the married woman. The woman never c ard at all. It seemed uniform her financial problem let her identity variety. She was never the akin woman once more. One day, as she was quiescency in the couch, she heard citizenry talking extraneous. mire to her realization, they were the police in their place trying to watch for her.She went out and was brought by the police in heir office for some interrogation. Although very much humiliated of the neighbors watching them, she never tried h iding her face, because as much as she wanted to, the great deal somewhat her would still know that it was her. So she believed there was no chance of escaping from embarrassment. Her friend, unitedly with the police, communicateed her so some things slightly their issue and asked her to sign in a slenderize avowing she would pay in months time together with the incurred interests. She was very much ashamed of what happened. She everlastingly cried.Her family sympathized so much with her. They were kick d takestairsings way to servicing her in use and cheered her up for her to forget her problem even in a little while. Soon they discovered it was useless doing that. What they did was invite relatives to visit her who were all telling her that everything would bias out discipline. To their disappointment, it did not help too much. redden being obedient to her did not do too good in the problem. Although everyone noticed that she was needing help, nobody succeeded in making their part. She cried more and slept less. Her physical appearance talked much slightly what she was suffering then.She never talked most the debt and chose to locomote away from the situation as much as realistic. Because it seemed like it was helping, the family never mentioned about(predicate) it anymore. But time went by, the due date was coming. And there, the problem started again. The same scenarios were seen regarding her behavior. I believe that the situation is not scarcely a shallow one. It talks about money; and then it needs to be transaction with some more legal and psychological advices. The family members, as noted, never fazed asking how the problem started and were the money was used.Nobody even asked the narration of the feud and the reason why the woman was so much abnormal with the issue. It is just stated that they set ways to cheer her up and to help her, without even knowing the proper way of doing it and the best things that woman needed. S he was not asked how much she was needing. They terminate as well ask the help of a professional for her easy recovery on the matter. They might have used the focussing techniques for the subject to easily cope up with the situation. concord to a website regarding proponenting skills, it is very primal to listen and communicate well to make up the study part of good appriseing.What these kinds of batch actually needs is the assurance that they are accurately heard by their peers and listeners. It is evermore best to see them calm cumulus after they tell you their insights on the matter. They m antiquatediness also do probing because that is the only way to find out what else they are heart, other than what is being asked of them. They must(prenominal)iness have used open-ended questions for them to be able to elaborate on their answers and freely state what they are nip. Through that, the psyche’s burden testament be lessened and would feel make better. I t is always good to have your feeling voiced out and revealed in a free manner.Given the freedom of speech, one gets the feeling of relief and loses the tension that she or he is experiencing. intercourse is a very useful tool in helping a soulfulness feel better after a very depressing experience. In fact, many plenty who see unaccepted end of relatives and other related issues seek the help of professionals for talk over. The notify must not be very courtly in dealings with this. He or she must chose the most comfortable position while talking to the lymph node and must show interest for the lymph gland to feel open about the situation and say more of what he or she is undergoing.What they only wanted is for them to be heard. They may use empathetic responses to the lymph glands as they share their stories. Through this, the client would see that the talk over was able to attend well to his or her horizontal surface and fully understood what she or he is feeling at the moment. They keister also use the method acting of summarizing and paraphrasing the problem of a client. The counsel must ask the client what she or he is feeling and secern it according to his or her desire. After hearing the client’s side, the counsel bequeath then echo what the she or he said to clarify issues and make sure he or she heard the client right.The counsel must use his or her own words in repeating the story for them to be ale to see the experience in a contrastive view or perspective. By seeing it that way, the person will recognize new feelings that was not experienced believe and will therefore be beginner with everything. The piece of the counsel is so vital because it is them who take part in the rede. Without their proper knowledge on the right way of counseling, the purpose of it will be futile. The aim of helping the person in any manner will be useless because the rules were not executed properly.They must have a liberal knowledge on coun seling aside from the rudiments to have a successful one. cognize the counseling techniques will be a stepping stone to be a very effective counsel that everyone looks for nowadays. In general, listening to the client, probing for further information, asking open ended questions for freedom in answering, giving stressed responses for affection, summarizing and paraphrasing stories can be useful techniques in counseling. galore(postnominal) people must apply this in real life events. The person being interviewed is a woman with sic children. Four of which are boys and the rest are girls.She was a member of a upset family and had a very psychic traumatizing experience when she was younger. Her education was sponsored by her auntie who believed so much in her potentials and talents. She had a carry on of friends in and out of school. She never some(prenominal)ered plan of attack people for friendship, instead the other people go to her to introduce themselves. She was a woman with full federal agency and courage. She used to marry beauty and academic contests where she gained a plenteousness of fame and awards. She was known by everyone, because she has the beauty, the brains and the attitude. allone was her friend and all of them were kind to her. She came from a unconnected area and married a man whom she met in tertiary school. They were a happy couple then. They had all the things that they need, without forcing anyone in working. They two have good jobs that are able to ply for the needs of their family. They were indeed a happy family environ with love and care. It just by fate that the husband suffered from arthritis that later turned into the worse version of it. Every joint was already infected which made him paralyse and bed ridden. There were no ways for him to work anymore.That was the start of all the financial problems. The husband needed therapies as the children needed support for their education. The woman did not give up, inste ad she worked harder and found ways to earn more. The cooperation that they have is the family is one of the strengths that they are so rarefied of. Their children were cooperative and everyone was industrious. They always make sure that they make their part in the house chores and responsibly do the tasks assigned to them. The woman was brave and was courageous in all the problems and challenges that come her way.She was kind to everyone that made it possible for other people to also treat her well. She is better and was able to finish her degree with several achievements. She was always doing her best to be on top. She was technically a career woman and a successful one. Her weaknesses take her financial constraints. A disseminate of things get affected with her problems with money. She had been asking people to lend her some and promised to give it thorn in a particular day. She broken her word of honor that is why many people do not trust her at all.She had difficulty in building that trust since she did not do what she promised to the people around her. Also, because of working too much and spending a lot of time outside their home, she alienated track of her children. Her family, on the other hand, did not know her at all that much. They had difficulty dealing with her because they did not know the get along to use for them to be able to start the conversation the right way. She already lost her identity outside the home and has been opting to need going out with other people than her family.The problem that she is currently dealing with right now is the interposition and prejudice of other people towards her. A lot of the people around have not been the same anymore. Every relationship that she has with others is very civil. The intimacy of her relationships with others was lost. A lot of things changed. She’s thinking that it has something to do with her young problem with money. She never wanted to discuss and justify to them the issue, so it ended up losing intimate relationships. Her companions are never the same people again. She also lost her confidence in everything that she does.She never asked about her old friends and just remained as she is now after the incident. Although many people stare at her when she passes by or even if strangers never forget to glance at her when she’s out, she never dared explain. She believed that everything happened for the love that she has for her family. Nowadays, a lot of people are seeking help because of some problems dealing with interpersonal issues, including relationships with other people. It is not always that they get the best solution to their problems or even get the half of the satisfaction that they need when they ask for counseling.The main purpose why they seek help is for them to minimize the emotional burden that they are having every time they think of their problems. Also, they are aiming to lessen its cause on the people near them and their daily activities. It is sometimes very serious that it even causes their dysfunction in the society. Culture is a very large-minded factor in that mold every individual and their behavior in the society. That thing makes them. It continuously affect their being as they grow older. They can adopt it even if they strickle out of the place where it came from.It is already difficult removing what you got in the set of glossiness that your society got. Every person has differences in heathen background and penchant. Each is brought up variedly, thus require different approaches in counseling. correspond to Broom et. al in the book called Sociology: A Core Text with Adapted Readings, cultures vary in their ways of guiding human behavior. Understanding the clients ethnic background would be a very big help in giving off solutions and in the counseling itself. Knowing one’s orientation and composition will be a very big factor in deciding how to approach a client.The counse l will find it easier dealing with him or her, since she somewhat got the technique in counseling the client well. There will be a very little difficulty. There are clients who are sensitive with words and who may get pique once talked to in a manner that some other client needed. Some may never want talking about the family. This may be because the client came from a broken one or had a traumatizing experience inside his or her family. Some may not want dwelling too much on personal issues like the sexual ones. Knowing this will have a great relate on the role of the counsel in diligent listening.ethnical competence is very much relevant in dealing with this kind of issues since they are dealing with people in cross-cultural contexts. According to a website, â€Å"Cultural competence is a set of congruent behaviors, attitudes and policies and strategies that join in a system, agency, or among professionals and enable them to work effectively to cross-cultural situations both in legal profession and treatment contexts” (Cross, Dazron, Dennis and Isaacs, 1989). Cultural competence therefore is the baron to deal with the problems of people and relationships coming from different places with different cultural background.It is important to have that ability because instantly counseling is in demand. It will be very useful applying that ability in giving the right solutions. It is true that each person who asks for counseling has his or her own story that we must understand both in his or her context and ours. Cultural competence also helped in the relationship between the counsel and the client. It is a pre-requisite to an open relationship, which can lead to veracity and sincerity, which can make the counseling easier and more personal. allow us take for example the case that I have mentioned above.The woman lives in a remote are. There are probably very few people there, which means that only a number of persons know her and talk about if ever they do. Her situation now is very much different since she is funding in the city where a lot of people see her everyday. Her sensitivity of gossips probably rooted out of that fact. She may not be used to people doing that to her. She is also famous in school. She had a lot of friends. Everyone knew and adored her. But her setting changed into somewhat topsy-turvy when she gained friend whom put her into shame later on.Her trauma might have come from the reality that she is not used of being betrayed and treated in a not so nice manner. She came from a broken family, which might have taught her the values of having a glorious family. After the family members that she has now gets affected with what she was going through, she already gave up because of the fear of having the same kind of family again. She had a reputation in the place where she came from. Remember, she had the beauty, the brains and the attitude, so she can’t accept the fact that she became laugh lunge i n the place where she is living now.The culture in their place is very much different with the culture that she is witnessing now. Moreover, her experiences in academic and beauty contests were the reasons why she was talked about in that remote area where she came from and not about debts. The counsel must find the most efficient way to hip her by studying her cultural background and be aware of the present differences. The role of the counsel is not basically to listen, but to understand. How more can he understand if he does not even know where the client came from and the cultures that brought him up?If the counsel is able to help her out of this, she may be able to function well again. She can go back to work and provide the needs of her family. She will again understand why she works altogether and why her friend did that to her. She may go back to her normal life and be confident again with actions. She may even discover that she also sinned by not facing her friend to talk about the matter. And who knows, she may have her lost relationships back. The efficiency of a counsel can be seen on the client. I have presented in this paper that counseling plays an important role in the society.They can help patients change for the better and realize what is wrong with them by just listening and understanding their cases. In the past, counseling is just done to mentally ill patients. But now, even the mere fact that you are sad can already require professional counseling. We can’t deny that one of its purposes is to lessen attempts of suicide and other things that a patient can do due to too much depression. The counsel must be very responsible about this because ending up an interpersonal problem somewhat depends on them. They must find a way to learn what must be learned in order for them to be called as such.Their primary roles must given direction to by enhancing their talents in helping people with problems. References Bonjean, C. M. , D. Broom, a nd L. Broom. 1990. Sociology: A Core Text With Adapted Readings. California: Wadsworth issue Company. Cultural Competence and Professional Psychology Training. (2008). Retrieved celestial latitude 7, 2008, from Goliath Website: http://goliath. ecnext. com/coms2/gi_0199-159598/Cultural-competence-and-professional-psychology. html. Counseling Skills: Basic Counseling Skills for any Situation. (n. d). Retrieved December 7, 2008, from http://www. askmikethecounselor2. com/counselingskills. html.\r\n'